OLD LETTERS

Old letters are like journals.
Before my Mother passed she gave me a large box of letters. Every letter I had ever written her since I was an adult was in that box. For many years we lived in different area's so writing letters was our form of communication. In the olden days as my grandchildren would call them, calling long distance was really prohibitive as it could make for a very expensive phone bill if you were not careful. So it was truly a treat when we talked on the phone as it did not happen that often.
The letters I have commence in the early seventies. Before that time my parents lived near us so no need for writing.  The letters in the seventies are primarily seasonal letters as my parents would spend the winters Arizona the rest of the year they lived in our same community.
So it is quite amazing to read my words written by hand on pretty stationary or cards or on cheap lined paper and scraps of this and that. I poured my heart out at times and shared what was happening in our household.  I see though that I withheld some information that would have been worrisome for them and glorified other events to make my parents feel happy. 
Regardless I love reading them and it seems at least once every couple years I pull a batch out and read them as if I am possessed. Once I start a packet I cannot quit. I am truly so happy I have these as well as the ones my mother wrote to me that I saved.
It makes me realize what a large life I have lived as I have forgotten so much. Reading them brings me back to that place in time and I become immersed in that day that I put pen to paper. So I say thanks Mom for holding on to all that history.

This afternoon the showers started and now that continual drizzle in happening. The house seems dark I have lamps in every room turned on as I do in winter. Our little electric fireplace is glowing orange making all seem warm and comfy. 
It is not cold however we have no heat on. Hubby asked if I wanted the furnace turned on. No, I said. I like it like this. I do not like feeling overly warm in the house.  He said, I am going to grab my flannel shirt and he put on his long pants too! He lives most of the year in shorts.  I said, are you the same man that came knocking at our motor coach door a few years ago looking like the abominable  snowman? He sheepishly said yes.
We had camped in the parking lot of Mt. Bachelor ski resort for a couple of nights. He had left early that morning to go cross country skiing. It was snowing hard and the wind was wild. By the time he came home late afternoon he was a frozen snowman. His hat, face, mustache, were frozen over. He was so happy and thrilled with his ski trip.   Now he grabs a flannel shirt when our first rain starts?.....well you can see why I gave him a hard time.

Last night we had wild caught cod fish. The fish was crusty on the outside and so succulent and juicy on the inside. Along with homemade tarter sauce and coleslaw and dressing it was a feast.
I watched hubby as he ate. A piece of fish in one hand dipping into the tarter sauce a bottle of malt vinegar in the other giving it a good sprinkle. Then his smile as he pops the fish into his mouth.....mmmnnn such pleasure.

Sunday we are having a butterflied whole chicken.  I will do as I did last time making a rub of  warm spices(cumin, allspice, paprika, coriander, salt and pepper)  and laying the chicken on a bed of rosemary, garlic and onions. To the side we will have danish squash filled with butter, salt, pepper and cinnamon. Red potatoes with parsley and butter and more coleslaw as I bought a large head of cabbage.

So enough talk about food as it is making me hungry. Right now I want to get back to my book. This book is a riot. I find myself laughing out loud.
I just finished a beautiful tender book by Elizabeth Berg written in the time of world war 11. 
This new book is quite off the wall and funny yet filled with details of the late fifties and early sixties  So I can really relate   I love it so far and I am only into the 3rd chapter. So now it is calling or I should screaming at me to come and open it once again.

Well now it is a day later. I got involved yesterday and did not get back to the computer.
So this Saturday morning I find myself alone for the entire day. Not a bad thing I will make it a productive day.
I have finished re-covering the dining room chair seats. I am pleased with the results. 
Today I am going to try to reclaim some space in my sideboard and china cabinet. Both are running over and I have not bought new items so I know it is just a matter of rearranging items.
We are having family for Thanksgiving so the china cabinet sparkling and orderly is a must.
Of course I will make time for my wild wacky book today. I normally do not read these kinds of books but I am so enjoying it.

No rain today but it gray and all is wet from yesterdays drizzle.
I may decide to make a couple loaves of bread today, seems just the perfect type of day for bread making.
Off I go.

MAKING APPLESAUCE

Who does not love homemade applesauce? Of course this applesauce is made with gravenstein apples. Hubby just loves it dished up plain and simple. I do too but I especially love it spooned over pancakes or waffles so yummy. What I made the other day is almost gone I will try to get another batch or two made before the apples are over for the season.

Well I started the chair seat covers yesterday but could not finish the project. I could not get the screws that hold the seats on out of the chairs. So I am stuck until hubby does that for me. Oh well I am in no rush I suppose. The covers are all cut and ready to go so once I get to it all will go fast.

Today I am off to do a bit of shopping. There are few things I need. It is a another very awesome day so will not mind a little running around but the sooner the better before the lunch hour starts. The freeways and stores surely are busier then.

Tomorrow for dinner I am making a new slow cooker recipe. I am going to make stuffed green peppers in the slow cooker I bet they will be amazing as the slow cooker really melds the flavors. I will stuff the peppers with ground pork and beef, rice and seasonings. I am using our roasted tomato sauce to cover them in. I am thinking they will be very tasty. I will serve them with mashed potatoes that is our favorite side dish with stuffed peppers.
If they turn out grand I will take a photo and share my recipe with you.

Last night we had a simple old time meal. I made a tuna noodle casserole with a white cream sauce, cheddar cheese, celery, yellow peppers, onions and peas. It is very good, creamy with the cheesy sauce and has a bit of a crunch from the celery, onions and peppers. I served it up with lots of sliced red tomatoes from our garden. We will just repeat tonight with the addition of garlic bread.

I have my lightweight down comforter in the washer. I know it is best to have it dry cleaned but it is old and I figured I would just clean it myself. It will go on our bed this afternoon. I was chilly this morning with only our lightweight cotton quilt. So the summer bedding is going away this afternoon and a fall scenario is going to take it's place.

I have nothing else to share and know this is boring so I will leave you know and get onto my chores.
I cannot wait to get outside this morning to enjoy this pristine day.
Bye for now.

CHILDHOOD MEMORIES IN A BROWN PAPER BAG?

Yesterday afternoon I opened a brown paper that held six large gravenstein apples purchased at the farm. You are going to say here she is with the apple stories again well.......
I was preparing to make a small batch of applesauce. 
When I opened the bag my summers from childhood jumped out at me. I closed my eyes and went back into myself. Memories stirred within me that had not been roused for years. I will not go into the details but it brought tears to my eyes and a large lump deep in my throat. Not because I was sad in any way but because I was that young girl again on a summer's day living on the farm with my Mom in the kitchen and my little brother outdoors playing. With the warm sun high in the sky, the big white clouds, the grasshoppers, the horse hanging his head over the fence waiting for tidbits. The dog and the many cats scampering about. The buzz of bee's busy in the flowers along the sidewalk, the scent of blackberries thick in my throat and most of all the sweet juicy aroma of those apples. Yes all of that came back to me as I stood in my kitchen with my nose tucked into that bag inhaling deeply those six sweet fragrant apples. 
Hubby comes in and says "what are you doing?" I look at him and smile, how can I explain? So I just said, it is only some childhood memories in a brown paper bag. He looked at me knowingly and nodded, he knows how I am.

I am alone today. My husband left early for the job site. It was totally dark when we left the comfort and warmth of our bed. The house was colder than it had been for many months now. I rustled up my thick furry slippers and a cozy hoodie. As the sausage cooked and the egg sizzled for hubby's breakfast I warmed up slowly sipping my hot coffee. It truly was our first fall morning.
Now the sun is hot on the deck and I will go out as I do each day at this time to sit and read and sop of some vitamin D for a while. I wonder how long this amazing weather will last?

I will leave you now to enjoy this October day.

GAME FARE

Yes pretty good chow. Not the best photo's the plates lack in presentation but what can I say I had been sipping champagne waiting for the late OREGON game to start. Does that not explain it all? 
The lobster was succulent and sweet, the ribs we actually had the day before but they made for an excellent appetizer earlier in the day. 
We spanked Washington as they say. What a game in the beginning  That is the way it tends to be, a rather slow start then watch out. It is because of all the depth we have and too our endurance is amazing. Could we possibly hold that number two ranking in the nation and play Alabama for the National title? Who knows, that is many games away but fun to dream a bit.

What can I say about today that I have not said numerously this autumn season?
But I will try.
What I saw this morning when I opened the back door was cobalt blue. A sea above me of the deepest blue in the foreground were several leaf trees golden at this stage and then the dense dark green of our hedge. Combined it was a color wheel of beauty.
The air was chilly with the night time cold still hovering at it's edges.
A squirrel was running quickly along the lattice above the hot tub and I saw cat paw tracks on the spa lid. A grand place for a sleeping tabby at night as the cover is warm and comfy.
I closed the door as my arms were starting to goose bump. The just brewed hot coffee surely tasted good and warmed me through. I need to start pulling on my sweats and furry slippers now in the mornings instead of wandering out in my summer sleeping attire.
Now it has warmed and both doors are open to the fresh air of fall. Hubby has went to his sister's house for a few hours to help with a project so the house is quiet except for the bird and squirrel chatter outdoors.
I am at peace.

I had a long conversation with my son this morning. It was so nice to hear from him. He has been putting in such long hours at work he have not communicated much of late.
I wished my little granddaughter Kali a Happy Birthday. My daughter is having a celebration lunch for her today.

I will leave you now and enjoy this perfectly appointed autumn day.
Ciao.

A DUCKY PUMPKIN

Well here he is once again. I posted this photo last year. So now he sits once again in our family room. So why take another photo when it is all the same this year?
Our game tonight is with Washington at home. We expect to do well, but those that know college ball know anything can happen at any time. 
Another late game hard to stay awake in the 4th quarter no matter what the score. On a normal day we go to bed quite early like ten at the latest and are up at six.

We are having huge lobsters tonight for the game. I have them prepped and posing in the fridge. The salad and dressing are made and I am slowly sipping champagne. It is a while yet before the game starts so I must be aware. Do not want to be asleep when it starts lol.

Another day of accomplishments. Hubby has the hot tub HOT! He may take the first soak of the season after the game tonight(if he is still awake). Good luck with that.
Today I made applesauce and pickles too. I make a little pickle recipe that I will not share....... it is a secret because it is so easy it is truly embarrassing. I get so many compliments on these pickles and just say thanks as what else can I say? A ten year old could do this recipe. But regardless I will take the compliments and enjoy the celebrity of the best sweet/dill pickle anyone has ever tasted.....well whatever.
So I had fun in my kitchen today.
I re-covered two dining room chairs in the new fabric. They do look smashing! I will do the rest tomorrow.

My older brother called this afternoon and I had to spend time talking with him. I love him so. We are the only two left of our immediate family so it is so important to be in touch and share stories and love. We were on the phone for over an hour that is our usual time for a visit. So the chair cushions can wait.

My granddaughter's Kali's birthday is tomorrow. She is a little doll always has been. A small gal with a big personality. She is my youngest granddaughter. She is a CNA at the moment but will taking additional training starting in January. She is very excited about that. 
This summer she gave me about eight tops. What a deal. I have worn them all this summer. She was so funny bringing this one to me then that one and saying, Gramma try this on it will be so cute on you!
Well what can I say other than I am smashing in my granddaughter's Kali's clothes! Too sweet.

Well I will leave you now. It is time for another small glass of champagne. I need to make the croutons for the salad and we are set.

Have a fun Saturday night whatever your pleasure.
GO OREGON DUCKS !!!!!

LOVING FALL

This is my favorite time of year as you all know.
Every morning I wake up and I am happy. Happy to see the fall colors coming on, happy to see the deep blue cloudless sky, happy to smell the fresh brisk air, happy to bake and make and decorate. A perfect season for Zo.

So today I begin this incredible day by first of all taking care of business which of course is my house. After these to-do's I will be making another batch of applesauce, baking my fave chocolate chip/walnut cookies, and recovering my dinning room chair seats. So a little of everything. A fruitful day.

Yesterday hubby hung the new wood blinds in the office the day before he put up a new small contemporary fan light in the office. That inspired me to clean and wax all the office furniture, windows, floors etc. So now as I sit here typing I am thrilled with what we have done. This is a great space and now it is sparkly clean, organized and best of all the light coming through the wood blinds and the new fan/light makes it perfect.

Yesterday I went to the farms that are nearby and purchased three pumpkins, a daddy, mommy and baby pumpkin. That was all that was needed to complete our front porch area.  At the farms I also picked up the needed veggies and fruits for the coming week. As I said before having those farms right down the road about a mile away is truly grand. The produce I bought there yesterday all looks invitingly good.
For last nights dinner I made one of my favorites recipes with some the bounty.
It is a baking pan chucked full of veggies. A red and green sweet pepper 1/2 inch chunks,  a large zucchini, a yam, a sweet potato and a yukon gold all 1/2 inch pieces, red onion slices, two garlic cloves minced and the best part fresh sliced tomatoes from our garden cover the top then all is drizzled with olive oil,  add salt and pepper give it a good stir then top with a combination of fresh grated Parmesan cheese and Italian bread crumbs add another drizzle of oil over the top. Bake at 400 for about forty minutes. I love this dish in the fall. 
There is some left over as I made quite a lot so today I am going to add some V8 juice to the leftovers put in the blender and puree then pour into a quart jar and freeze. All those good veggies will be amazing added to a soup or stew later on.

Tonight for dinner we are having grilled pork spare ribs. We do not care for the baby backs as they tend to be dry and there is no meat compared to regular St. Louis style ribs. I bought a fine rack yesterday at a great price. So I will tear off the silver or membrane from the back of the ribs then I will give them a rub of my steak rub this afternoon and let them a sit a hour or so then put into a roasting pan, add a tad of water to bottom, cover and bake at 325 degrees for about an hour. You can bake longer if you like them fork tender when they come out of the oven and then just sauce them till heated on the grill. However we like to be outdoors and slowly baste them on a 300-350 grill for a about a hour till tender.
The mop sauce I make is very easy.
Carolina style BBQ sauce Zo's version.
This makes about a cup enough for a nice rack of ribs.
1/2-3/4 cup honey bbq sauce
1/4 cup white vinegar
1 tablespoon of brown sugar
one healthy squirt of ketchup or chili sauce
black pepper
Franks red hot sauce to taste.
Mix well.
Spray your grill with oil
Then add the ribs( We cut them in about three sections)
Mop with the sauce turning occasionally. Continue to mop with the sauce until the ribs are sticky and starting to blacken at the edges.

This method is easy and you grill on a charcoal fire or gas.
Tonight we will have corn on the cob fresh picked yesterday and baked beans straight from the can lol.
Bon appetit'

I will leave you now and get on with an amazing day.
We have been blessed this fall still no rain in sight and the temps holding into the seventies. Sort of takes the disappointment away from the damp, cool wet spring.

BROTHER JIM

I am writing today about my younger brother James Arthur Nesbitt. He died eleven years ago today of a heroin overdose. At the time of his death there were several deaths attributed to what they called dirty heroin on the streets of Portland. We feel this what happened that it was not intentional it was a accident due to the lifestyle he led and the choices he made.
He actually was very happy that day if the accounts we heard were true. He had been approved for a government loan and was buying a small home near where our Mother lived. He had went to Portland with the couple he was rooming with to pick up his government check and his med's. He never returned. 

Life is what we make it right? Sometimes it throws us a wallop like it did for Jim. After high school graduation he was very happy that he had landed a job with a local company running heavy equipment and most importantly working outdoors in the woods. His love. He had been on his job for a while doing a good job and had the respect of those he worked for. Then the papers came. Vietnam. Before we knew it he was gone. My parents visited him at Ft. Lewis in Washington state and off he went to Nam. We of course got the letters stating what an impossible war it was. How they were in area's that they were not to be in, like Cambodia. How he was being covered with and inhaling agent orange. How he and his unit were given drugs to help them deal with the demands, stress and fear of being on watch. He asked the folks to send him a small knife to put under his pillow at night. They did as requested whether he received it I do not recall. He was afraid from the moment he woke up until he went to sleep. My heart breaks for all those young men who lost their lives, lost their minds, lost their limbs and lost eventually who they ever where.
When he finally made his journey home and stepped off the bus in the small town we all lived my heart broke. So thin, wasted away, sad eyes with no life left in them, a low flat voice. Where was my brother I wanted to know.
Jim slowly healed with the love of his family and caring friends. But he was not the same boy. He dabbled in lightweight drugs like pot and he drank. He seemed happiest when he was high on something. 
His life took him on a different path. A difficult path throughout the years, with many jobs, addiction, lost loves and ultimately the departure of his wife along with his two young children.
A family gets worn down in these situations and gets tired of the problems, gets tired of trying to help over and over again. My parents were in for the long haul and continued to give support and love in ways that they could. But in the end nothing helped. He left us regardless. I am relieved that my parents died before Jim as it would have been so unbelievably hard for them to bear.

So that is a sad story about my brother. I prefer to remember the best parts of his life. Our lives together living on the farm when he was young(a little pest) and then moving to Central Oregon. All the outdoor recreational things he enjoyed doing. The many camping trips and family outings we all enjoyed together. 
Jim and I had three things very much in common. We both had a love for reading,writing and music. Jim did not play an instrument but he so loved music and we would listen together to various kinds of music. We would discuss books that we each had read, and share our writings with one another. 

Your kids miss you Jim, your siblings miss you. You never had the chance to meet your little grandson. We so wish it would not have ended that way.
I had a dream about you last night actually. It was like most of the dreams I have about you. You were young in your teens, you were happy, you dark eyes  sparkling and laughing and those artistic looking hands with the long fingers were flying around in conversation. I was so happy to be in your presence. You grabbed me up and twirled me around and my heart sang and just at that moment I woke. You have been on my mind all day.

James Arthur Nesbitt 
Born October 12, 1949 Portland OR.
Died October 1, 2001  Portland OR.
Bless you always brother.